Beating: It's in the Eye of the Receiver

A headline in the news caught my attention this morning… Texas judge needs help, says beaten daughter. Judge Who Beat Daughter Not RemorsefulJudge William Adams Who Beat Daughter Says He Did Nothing… a long list of catchy one-liners popped up in my Google search.

After only being able to bear watching parts of the "beating/spanking" video, I was curious as to what my Facebook friends thought about the Adams Family Video, so I asked them. Some felt that she deserved the beating she received because she was wrong for downloading music illegally from the internet and that they themselves had experienced much worse beatings than that one. Others felt that after watching the video, the father’s words were much worse than the beating that he gave his daughter. Some vehemently opposed to his discipline tactics altogether.

Xavier, a fictional character in my latest novel, Running from Solace, told his school principal and child protective services that he had been abused by his mother. But, Xavier had bruises and very noticeable ones which led to immediate action on his behalf. Not one person that read Running from Solace sympathized with his abusive mother, Mona. Some readers expressed empathy at times, but never sympathy or understanding. However, why in the real-life case of Hillary (daughter) and Judge William Adams (father), are we questioning the validity of what Hillary, then sixteen and now twenty-three says happened to her. Hillary flat out feels as though she had been abused as a child and that her father could benefit from some help. Who are we to question that? Who are we argue that it wasn’t that bad or defend her father because she didn’t burst out in a waterfall of tears. If you read Running from Solace, remember Xavier refused to give his mother the satisfaction of seeing him cry. 

Why is it that because what happened to you was worse than what happened to me, then it means that mine wasn’t that bad? You say beating…I say spanking. No matter the case, for Hillary to hold onto a video-taped beating for seven long years, well, for me… that smells like smoke. And we all know the old clichĂ©, where there’s smoke, there’s bound to be a fire. You see, abuse, beatings or spankings look different in every family or relationship and whether it’s a black eye or bruised heart—they both hurt. And they both need to heal and the entire process takes time. And for the Adams family, the process is only now about to begin.

Now, I'm not defending or persecuting anyone here, but, if we can cry for Xavier, a fictional character, let’s show some compassion and shed tears for real victims because every 10 seconds an allegation of child abuse is made in the United States.

1 comment:

Farrah Adams said...

I agree with your thoughts on this situation 100% Nakia. From the time I made my comments as one of your facebook friends,on the phone talking about it and in the beauty shop. The barber in the beauty shop and I were in a real debate about the situation. He said that he feels that hillary only wants to mess up her dad life because she mad. He said that something is mentally wrong with her. He also stated that it's not like he molested her or something. He said she deserved the whipping and evrything that came along with it and that they need to be whipped more now days. My concern is"Why would she hide the camera and hold on to it for seven years?" To me I would think that this abuse has happened a lot of times before this and only God knows what else. In my opinion she had no chance of coming out with it when she was a teenager as popular as her father was. It could be many of reasons why she held on to it for so long. It seem like to me it is a lot more to this story. I have been in seem like debates all day about this. Just because she may seem heartless to the situation she could be very well so deeply hurt. As for Mona, it's like it was a repeating cycle. how do you love when you don't know how and never really received it. I just can't get with the abuse thing.